The First Month - We Survived (Just Barely)!

Part I:

The First Two Weeks went by fairly quickly - too quickly, in fact, for me. Adrian was on leave to help out at home, and things were pretty smooth sailing as we all adjusted to having a newborn at home. David was feeding well, gaining weight and filling out. His jaundice was clearing up by the 10th day, but then again, the serum bilirubin levels were never really high to begin with.

I soon got the hang of changing his diaper - although I must say, it's really a lot more stressful than changing Cherise's diaper! I mean, hey, there's a time limit here! Don't take too long, quick wipe wipe not so clean never mind tick tock tick tock close up diaper before he p.. oops too late. The day before Adrian was due back at work, David blessed us with what Adrian and I will always remember as the "poo incident". A poo like no other. I was changing his diaper alone (thought I was pretty zai by then), preparing to head out to the airport to see my sister off. I lifted his bum to wipe when suddenly, without any warning whatsoever, whoosh! out flew (and I mean flew) a stream of projectile poop! I think it must have been the angle (you know, physics, 45 degrees and the projectile attains greatest horizontal distance yadda yadda) at which I was lifting his bum, but he should have won, or at least been in the running for, the prize for the furthest flying poop. It flew over a metre. Hit the two trolley organisers in which we keep Cherise's and David's clothes. Yes, hit them both. Hit the clothes in the trolleys. Hit the wall behind the two trolleys. Would probably have gone further if not for the wall. Needless to say, we were late going to the airport. The amount of cleanup to be done was mind-blowing. Part of his flying poop hit my hand. I can still remember - it felt warm. Eww.

Humorous incidents aside, I spent the first two weeks in a funny kind of emotional roller coaster. Happy to have Adrian at home, enjoying getting acquainted with David, and yet, weepy and consumed with guilt when it came to Cherise. I fretted that I wasn't spending enough time with her. She was the perfect big sister - not an ounce of jealousy. Loved kissing him and kept asking me to carry him. But I fretted - "I think she misses me, she must be missing me." "I miss her so much!" "She's looking at me - I think she misses me! I think she feels jealous but she's too good to ask!" I felt guilty - guilty that I had to spend all this time with the newborn, and not with Cherise. And I was sad that I couldn't do lots of things which I used to do with her - like feed her, bathe her, put her to bed... Things which Adrian now got to do. She grew closer to her daddy, it was "Daddy baobao" now, not "Mommy baobao" anymore. And each night as I cuddled her while she slept I cried at the loss I felt. And Adrian would roll his eyes at me.

Part II:

The Next Two Weeks was just plain exhaustion. Whatever guilt I felt went out the window. No time for guilt. No energy for guilt. No energy for feeling anything. My days flew by in a flurry of pee, poop and milk. Adrian was back at work, and we (the rest of us) spent our day times camped out at my mom's place, which is, thankfully, just the next block.

David is one gassy baby. A gassy baby with a sluggish digestive system. Unlike his sister who would religiously poop after every feed, David grunts and groans his discomfort until the huge (stored) poop comes out. Usually this grunting and groaning goes on for hours. More specifically, between the hours of 5 and 8. AM. It's like, he needs to poop to get comfortable, but he can't because he's too sleepy. Terrible. And his grunting is so loud it wakes everyone up. Even my helper says she can hear him from the kitchen. So we've been starting earlier and earlier in the mornings because Cherise gets woken up by noisy David. One day she even got up at 630am. My day starts when he starts his "music". I carry him out of the room so that Cherise doesn't wake up, and I walk around and basically do all sorts of things to get him comfortable but really, nothing works till he poops the big one.

So I've been really sleep-deprived. We all have been. But we made it. And things are settling down somewhat.

At my mom's place, even though I'm busy with David most of the time, I get short breaks when my mom takes over, and I get to sit and play with Cherise for a while. Sometimes, I feed her lunch. Sometimes, I join her during her morning bath and splash her with water as she tries to splash me back. I don't get to cuddle her to sleep, but I get to cuddle her when she wakes up from her afternoon nap. Adrian comes to pick us up when he gets home in the evenings, and it's a happy reunion. We have dinner, then we have Family Bath Time. We all take our baths from 8 to 9pm. No, not all together, but well, we bathe David first, then I shower, then Cherise and lastly Adrian. Then supper for the little girl and it's off to bed. Adrian and I will argue over who gets to put Cherise to bed. Usually I win. So I cuddle her and sing songs and pray our prayers - all those things we used to do together, while Adrian gets to carry David around (bonding with his son, I call it), and it's nice and sweet as we girls drop off to dreamland together.

And then we wake up the next day (don't forget the night-time nursings and diaper changes!) and do it all again.

Noisy Baby

In my description of David, I mentioned that he makes funny noises like a grumpy old man. He does it in his sleep, when we carry him, when he is unhappy...basically he does it all the time. Not convinced? Hear it for yourself.

Now, I'm not trying to brag about our abilities but the truth is, Jas and I are pretty decent in the singing department. David's squawking and grunting are beginning to make us wonder..."Happy Feet"???

It's ok son...go ahead...make a joyful noise unto the Lord!

Birth Story - Daddy's Point of View

If I have one word to describe David's birth, it would be this: Back-Breaking.

No...really...at the end of the whole thing, I could hardly stand up straight and my feet hurt like crazy. No wonder doulas charge ridiculous fees for their work, it's quite a task, considering I merely did a tiny fraction of what they would do. Not that I didn't enjoy the whole process though.

Jasmine made it very clear from the start of the pregnancy that she wanted this time to be as natural as possible. I was all for the idea (can save money mah ha ha!!!) and I offered to do whatever I could to aid in the process. However, I had to draw the line when she wanted a home birth - can you imagine the cost of replacing our laminated flooring if it gets stained by all the you-know-what?!?! Anyway, she then later toyed with the idea of engaging a doula to assist in the birth but I was not very keen because I really wanted to be a lot more involved this time round. Ok, confession time: I was quite useless the last time cos' while Jasmine was agonising in pain, I was blissfully snoring away in the labour ward...model husband right? Anyway, Jasmine was kind enough to accommodate my request to make amends this time round but not without making me go through a series of literature on how to be a labour coach. I had to spend most of my night duties reading the materials on the Labour Coach's Notebook which she printed out for me.

Well, reading about the various coaching techniques was easy, executing them was anything but. What used to work suddenly got on her nerves. I had to change from one massaging technique to another because she suddenly didn't like to be touched in a particular way, I had to contort my body into positions I never knew I could so that I could support her as she writhed in pain, I never got to sit down because she felt more comfortable in the arm chair that was meant for me (and I refused to sit on the floor, knowing what often ends up on said floor)... the list goes on. In the midst of everything, I suddenly forgot how to identify the stages of labour so I didn't even realise when she actually went into transition. Before I knew it, she was ready to push and I could not even let go of her for 1 second to turn the TV off (yes, I'm a TV addict).

It was a tiring affair indeed, but you know what, it felt great! It felt great to be so involved in the process. It felt great looking into her eyes as I helped her to control her pushing. It felt even greater looking at her sigh of relief when they placed David on her chest. It felt great knowing that we did it together. Yeah, I know that what I went through was nothing compared to what Jasmine had to go through. But if you compare this labour with the previous one, this was a big deal to me.

For the record, I really respect Jasmine for having the guts to go through it with no pain relief whatsoever. Honestly, I was expecting her to cave in and ask for something, but she didn't. Maybe it helped that I told her due to the shortage of rooms, we had no choice but to upgrade to a deluxe room which meant that we had no budget for any extras... ha ha. Jokes aside, my wife was really brave and I love her so much more for it. I don't think I have that kind of threshold.

As for me, the icing on the cake was that I got to cut the cord this time...wow...I want to do it again...if The Mammy is agreeable.

Birthstory!

Long overdue post! Here's little David's birthstory:

At 39 weeks (6th April), I was feeling rather depressed. No sign that anything was happening and the physical exhaustion was making it hard to get up in the mornings. I left Cherise with my parents and headed out to make myself feel better. Went for a pre-delivery makeover - cut my hair, had a facial and massage. Thought maybe I was too tense for labour to start.

True enough, after the massage and all, I had the show at 3am (7th April), and contractions were ten minutes apart. By 9am, they were 6 minutes apart. I really didn't want to go to the hospital because I wanted to labour at home as long as possible, but the gynae's office receptionist told me to hurry down as it was my second child and things could happen rather quickly. So at 11am, we saw the gynae and he said I was 3cm dilated. He gave me two options - he could check me into the hospital or I could choose to labour at home. As I was hoping for as natural a birth as possible this time round, I chose not to stay in the hospital as it would leave me with nothing to do but focus on the pain.

So we went for lunch at United Square, hoping the walking would speed things up a bit. The contractions were painful enough now so that I couldn't really talk nor walk during one, but I still managed to get some shopping done. (It's amazing - the woman's capacity to shop under all circumstances...)

At 3pm, we were back at Thomson Medical Centre, this time to stay. At this point, I must add that I think we picked a wonderful doctor this time round. He's got a reputation for being very pro-natural, and this was reflected in the way the nurses at the labour ward treated me. The first question they asked, upon finding out who my doctor was, was, "Do you have a birth plan?" I replied no, but this gave me the opportunity to state that I only had one request - that I not be chained strapped confined to the bed during labour. I was also offered the room with the tub (for women who wanted to labour in water) but I turned it down. I did ask for a birth ball (which I never got to buy) but it wasn't available at that time.

I think the attitude of the nurses set the tone for the whole labour process. I had options, hence I felt in control. So different from the last time when I was hustled and bundled and strapped into bed and left there to suffer. I spent the next few hours keeping active, working through my contractions, which weren't half as bad as they were with Cherise. Adrian was a fantastic labour coach - the poor guy massaged my back between contractions, fed me milo when I got hungry, let me lean into his nice tummy when the pain got too much to bear...

At around 6 plus (I didn't note the time), I felt that things were different. I told Adrian to get the nurses, who did hustle me into bed this time, and found that I was 6 to 7cm dilated already. My waters broke, and things happened really quickly now - I kept wanting to push, but the nurses wouldn't let me, not till the doctor arrived, and once he did, David was out in a matter of minutes! Adrian said 3 pushes, I think. Really fast. So our little boy arrived at 6.51pm, 7th April 2009. Here's a video of his first moments:



It was a wonderful experience. If I had any idea of what to expect, I would have wanted it this way. I didn't labour too long in the hospital, and it was as natural a process as it could be. I didn't take any pain relief meds at all, and nobody poked any needles into me. My waters were allowed to break naturally, and I didn't have an episiotomy. Maybe next time I'll try a homebirth! (If there is a next time..)

Thank you - those who were praying with us, and praise God for His hand in all this - from conception to delivery and thereafter!

David - The Arrival...

Hi everyone, sorry this came really late. Thought I'd better update everyone before it really becomes water under the bridge....

After waiting for a long 39 weeks, our son is finally here! Everyone, say hello to the latest addition to our family - David Nathaniel Loh.

Here is his biodata:
Date of Arrival: 7th of April 2009
Time: at 6:51pm
Weight: 3.04 kg
Length: 50 cm
Head Circumference: 34 cm

Ok, 4D punters may go crazy with the numbers now, just make sure you remember us when you strike it.

More about his birth story later, we're still trying to get the hang of dealing with a new born and a 20 month old hyper active girl at the same time. Not easy, but as usual, God is good. Give us a little more time adjusting to our new roles and I promise we'll update soon. Lot's of things to share with everyone!

In the meantime, thanks for your prayers and love!

Our Day at the Zoo

As part of our 2 Day wedding anniversary celebration, I took Jas and Cherise for our long awaited visit to the Zoo. My company signed up for the friends of the zoo corporate membership, so it allows me to bring the family in for free. We get discounts for food and merchandise purchases as well! Anyway, after countless unsuccessful bids to get hold of the membership card from the admin department, I finally managed to loan it out for a few days. We initially wanted to go on Wednesday, but since we could not get anyone to baby sit on Thursday, we decided go on Thursday instead.

We planned to start the day early so that we can squeeze in more activities before it gets too hot for us, but somehow the night was not restful for Cherise (hence similarly for us), so we ended up sleeping in and having a late start at about 11am. Jas and I cannot remember when was the last time we visited the zoo. All we know is that the place has changed quite a bit and as a local, I must say that I'm very impressed with the improvements made to this attraction.

Like most kids, Cherise LOVED the animals. It helped that she recognises some of them...everytime, she saw something that she knew she went, "wah..bunky (monkey), wah...tiger, wah...giraffe, wah...ohdile (crocodile), wah...torti (tortise)...big!" As expected, every species of bear is a teddy bear, and anything that walks on four legs and resembles a canine is a dog. She had a lot of fun mimicking the sounds of the animals and didn't seem to mind the stench coming from the animal droppings...unlike mommy who almost fainted after walking past the rhino exhibit ha ha! Cherise also got to pat a rabbit for the first time at the Pets Corner at the Rainforest Kidzworld... If we had known that they have a water play area there, we would have brought our swim gear along.

Sadly, we didn't get to watch any of the animal shows this time round. I'm sure Cherise would be thrilled to see what the elephants can do. For our next visit, I must be sure to plan the itinery properly so that we canmake the best of our time there. Oh, and next time, I won't even bother bringing a stroller...cos' this super duper zoo has EVERYTHING!

We left about 2pm, just as Cherise was getting tired and needed her afternoon nap. Jas says if we want to do this again, we should do it really soon cos' once David comes, we'll have to say bye bye to family excursions for a while. Yah man...better start to "chop" for the membership card again soon!

Here's a pic of happy Daddy and Mommy with a clearly tired Cherise.

For more pics of our outing, check out my Flickr Photo Page.

3 Years Already???

That was the thought that came to our minds as we were wondering how long it has been since we said our vows at the altar. Jasmine said it felt like only 2 years, probably because we did not celebrate our anniversary last year as I was away on an overseas exercise then. To make it up to her, I decided to celebrate the 3 years of our union over 2 days, one day by ourselves and the other with Cherise.

Jas's mom was available to babysit for us yesterday, so we took the advantage to do stuff that we usually would not be able to do if Cherise was with us. It was a simple affair - movie followed by dinner at the most baby unfriendly place we could find.

The Movie
For the first time in our lives, we stepped into Golden Village Cinema's Gold Class at Vivocity. When I stepped into the theatre, I was in total awe...it was quite embarrassing for Jas because I could not contain my excitement and kept playing with the seats - they can be reclined fully till you're literally watching the movie lying down - and they provide blankets! And man were the seats comfortable! We wanted to watch Red Cliff 2 initially but they didn't have it at the time that we wanted, so we settled for The Changeling instead. Jas commented later that considering the frequency of our visits to the movies (which is like erm...NEVER! The last time we watched a movie was when Jas was expecting Cherise!), we might as well go for Gold Class everytime. I totally agree.

The Dinner
Though still semi-full with popcorn and tortilla chips, we needed to take our dinner early to make it back in time to pick Cherise up (sigh...and you'd think that we're past the age of curfews). We chanced upon Tajimaya Yakiniku / Shabuya, a 2-in-1 concept restaurant at level 1. It's basically 2 restaurants operating under the same roof - One side offers BBQ, and the other steamboat - Japanese style. I was captivated by the Aussie Beef promotion so we went for the BBQ. Good thing that Cherise was not with us cos' we had to cook everything ourselves over a super hot charcoal grill...
IT's really hot man!
For the price of the meal, we didn't expect the spread to be so good...the economy must really be bad for them to offer so much for that price. Here's what we had:
The whole spread.
Two cuts of beef...the thin one tastes like Bak Kwa.
Chicken thigh and Kurubuta.
Veg
Shrimp
Salad
Tempura
Ice-cream
We tried our best to finish everything but it was simply overwhelming...
We hate to waste food but what to do...we were simply...
...too stuffed!

Alas, like Cinderella, we had a curfew to follow (8pm!!!) so we went wee wee wee all the way home to our little princess. Though our date was short, we enjoyed it totally. Hopefully we'll have more of these when our kids are a little more independent.